Thursday, April 28, 2011

My cup runneth over...

So today I was making supper and looked out of the window and what do I see? I see my amazing husband and my sweet daughter gardening together :) He was showing her how to do something. I'm not sure what it was but she rann off like a bullet and grabbed something for him then ran back and they were off working again. I don't think I will ever get over the felling of aww that I get when I see them together bonding and having a good time doing normal dad and daughter things. It kind of makes me want to cry (and only cried hard that one time, thank you!) I never thought I'd see Cielo go out of her comfort zone and do kid/dad things, only the kid/mom things. My heart is full everyday and I think there is no more room but then I look at both of them and it grows a little bit more and it makes a bit more room for next time. I can't imaging what my life would have been like if I hadn't had Cielo & met Jonathon.
I read a story today that made me cry. I'm a member of a chicken website (insert snikers here from people that think I'm crazy) and there is a forum and one of them is a space to post about your family. A lady from south TX  posted about the crap sentence that they gave the drunk idiot that killed 2 people and crippled her sister and another friend. It reminded me of Andrew. I miss him every day and wonder if he would have liked Jonthon. I like to think that they would have been great friends :) They both work harder than anyone else I know and have a way of making me smile just by existing. I think he would have been proud of Cielo and how smart she is and all of the things she is doing in school and how far ahead of her class she is. I wonder what he would have thought about my ducks and my chickens and the garden and our little farm we are making. Maybe he would have thought I am crazy but at the same time I bet he would have secretly loved it, lol. I miss him today. I miss him every day but today I miss him more. I miss his laugh and that half smile and his big hugs. Today I could use an Andrew hug. I'm greatfull that he hugged me that last time that I saw him because I know that that day he was happy and that it was a good day for him. I missed him at our wedding. He would have been my maid of honor if he had been here, sorry Ash lol.
I think I'm going to get a couple more chickens in a few months. The cornish crosses that we got are amazingly sweet. Every day I go out back and they come running up to me like I'm the best thing they have ever seen. They are the 2 we have left from the batch we bought at Gebo's when we bought the ducks. Maybe it's because they are the runts and they have been sick and their brooder-mates died or maybe it's because they have been picked on by every chicken and duck we have or it's just their little personalities but there is something about them that I don't want to lose them. They are super sweet and they depend on us so much. There is something about the way they run up to me when I go outside that I could watch them and cuddle them all day. I know it's crazy that I would care so much about a chicken or a duck but I don't mind being crazy because when you meet them you will like them and feel the same way about them :)

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